I figured out why the Israeli government has been cutting child allowance payments and grants to yeshivos. It's because they need the money for other things, like wasting it on rescuing stray cats from weird places.
I kid you not. I went to the Kosel last night to daven Maariv and to say "goodbye", so to speak, since I will be leaving Israel until Elul. When I got there, there were two major commotions in progress: a chefetz chashud (suspicious object, which may be a bomb) was being taken apart by a bomb squad robot, and a cat was stuck on a ledge about 30 feet off the ground right near the Kosel.
I don't know what's wrong with these people, but the cat was getting a LOT more attention than the potential bomb. A major rescue effort was launched, consisting of bringing a device that looked kind of like a free-standing elevator down to the Kosel plaza, and raising it up to the ledge, hoping that the cat would be stupid enough to give up its nice, comfortable perch in the center of attention in favor of a rickety metal platform that was whining and making all kinds of scary mechanical noises.
I don't even know why they were working so hard to try and save the cat - it's not like there's a shortage of cats around here. In fact, scientists estimate that there are approximately 2,000,000,000,000 different cats living under our dira's kitchen window alone. But it certainly made for a good show.
Anyway, when the Einsteins running the show finally realized that the cat wasn't going to climb onto the platform by itself without sending up someone to "help" it, they lowered the platform back down to the ground, and - you guessed it - sent it back up empty again. I'm serious. They actually raised and lowered the platform a few more times without doing a single thing to improve their strategy, as if they expected the cat to eventually give up and say, "alright, alright! I'm coming down!"
Finally, they realized that this just wasn't going to work, so they decided to try and appease the cat by sending it some food. Really. They put a tray with what appeared to be some tuna on it on the platform, and sent it back up.
At this point, the cat finally decided he had enough. Instead of going for the food, it turned around and jumped up a few feet into a window that was just above the ledge, leaving the guys who brought the machine open-mouthed. After a few moments, they just shrugged and lowered the platform down, and then carted the machine away. I kinda felt bad for them - they looked like they were hoping they were gonna get a round of applause when they got down, and now that opportunity was lost forever.
Now, here I am sitting in the airport, and my flight is being delayed. I wonder if maybe it's because there's a cat stuck on the wing...
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5 comments:
Funny!
My first thought when seeing your new blog post alert was: If you have time to post blogs the day you're leaving then you must be a VERY organized person!!
Looking forward to seeing you BE"H!
Zeits Gezunt!
Nesee'ah Tova!
Forget the cat! Who knew you are returning to the States (although, technically you didn't write that, you just said yuou were leaving). What will you be doing during your bain hazmanim. I for one enjoyed my summer months there more than I would have here.
Forget the cat! Who knew you are returning to the States
Ummmmmm... lots of people. What, you didn't? I thought my departure was reported in the Yated and the Hamodia!!!
Besides... well, you just didn't ask.
What will you be doing during your bain hazmanim.
I will IY"H be a counselor at a certain famous day camp in Lakewood.
I for one enjoyed my summer months there more than I would have here.
Well, I guess you lived back in an era where a) there were ways for a bochur to easily keep himself gainfully occupied in Israel on his own during the summer without running into spiritual problems, and b) there was nothing enjoyable to do in the States. I, however, live in an era where a) it isn't too easy for a bochur to keep himself gainfully occupied in Israel on his own during the summer without running into spiritual problems, and b) there is something enjoyable to do in the States.
Besides, if I'm not gonna come home for Succos, I have to come home now, or my "open ticket" would expire.
Hey I cant find a way to email you- but I am curious- if you can tell me how I can leave my website in the comment box so that it becomes a hyperlink in Vos Iz Neias.
@frumsatire:
If you use the mobile edition of Vos Iz Neias (which you are presented with when visiting the site from a mobile phone or a PDA), then they give you three fields to fill out - in addition to the usual "Name" and "Email" fields, there is also a "Website" field, which becomes the link from your comment on VIN to your own site.
I don't know how to do it from the regular version of the page, since I only ever use the mobile edition from my Pocket PC-based phone. Perhaps if you sign up for an "account" they will let you do it?
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